I Think I Did It
by TheDoodlesAreAlive
Summary: John convinces Nepeta to confess to Karkat, but things do not go quite as planned. Rated T only for language.


**I meant to post this in the spirit of Valentine's Day, but seeing as there is only one hour of 2/14 left, I guess this really is just NepeKat story I felt like writing. Oh well! It was fun to do, and I don't regret any of it. Please enjoy!**

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><p>EB: don't worry, nepeta!<p>

EB: i'm talking to him right now

EB: trust me, either its normal for karkat to start screaming when i'm talking to other trolls more than he can

EB: or he's seriously flushed for you!

AC: :|| well, if you say so, john

AC: :33 i guess i'll go try talking to him

AC: :33 wish me luck!

EB: of course!

EB: good luck, nepeta!

EB: i know you can do it!

She didn't close the program, but she did minimize it. Unless it went as she hoped it would, nobody was going to ever see that conversation.

Nepeta got up from her chair and faced the other side of the room. There, the boy of her dreams faced his computer, growling and slamming a fist on the keys. She only had to walk up and say, "Hi!" This was all she had to achieve.

One step, then another. Slowly, she found herself directly behind him, and he still hadn't noticed her presence.

"Karkitty?" she squeaked. She managed to keep most of the fear out of her voice, though anyone that knew her well enough would have been able to hear it. She thanked the highbloods Equius was too busy tinkering to be watching over his moirail. He would have been by her side the moment she walked up to this boy.

"Karkitty?" she said again. He heard her this time, and slowly turned to face her. She wasn't certain what kind of expression was on his face, but it was unlike any she had seen on him before.

"Uh…" She racked her brain for John's advice. "How are you?" It sounded awkward, but it helped a little, she thought.

"Fine," he said tersely. The looked around, afraid to meet each other's gaze. Nepeta could feel her hope fading fast. How was she supposed to do this? She would have done anything to go back to talking to John. At least her very being didn't depend on his opinion of her.

"And you?" he managed to get out. Nepeta smiled a little at his attempt.

"I'm okay," she said. "A little lonely."

Damn. The moment the words were out of her mouth, she knew they were the wrong ones.

"Uh, I mean, uh, with Equius gone, it's weird just sitting around waiting for something to happen."

"Er, yeah," Karkat agreed. "Sure."

More awkward silence. This was a terrible idea. What had Nepeta been thinking? She turned away to go back to her chair, the feeling of warm, green embarrassment already filling her face. She suddenly felt a hand grab hers. It wasn't tight, but she knew he wanted her to stay.

"Nepeta," he sighed, "We— I need to have a talk. With you. Right now."

Nepeta's hand trembled slightly. Her heart raced. Was this it? The moment she had been waiting for since she realized her feelings towards him? A tiny purr attempted to rise in her throat, but she squashed it before it made its way out. She couldn't let herself get too hopeful just yet.

"Do you want to go somewhere else, or…?" Nepeta asked. She shifted her feet slightly.

He nodded. Still holding her hand, he stood and left the lab with her in tow. He didn't say anything as they walked, but instead just pulled her along until he found a small, quiet space where there were no other trolls. She did her best to smile at him, though her nervousness made it look forced. They sat against the wall together. They were within arm's length of each other, but only barely.

They looked at each other and then away again. Karkat rarely looked nervous like this, but when he did, she thought it was adorable. She noticed how he shifted his position on the cold floor, and how he would glance at her, then find something interesting on the wall to look at instead. She wanted to say something, but she couldn't think of anything to say.

"So, how's John?" Karkat finally asked.

She looked at his hands, which were resting on the floor on either side of him. "What makes you ask that?" she inquired.

"Well, I know you two were talking earlier. How's he doing?"

Nepeta turned her gaze to the floor. Even his hands made her nervous. "He's fine. They're at a slow point in their game, I think."

"That's good, I guess. Sometimes all of the action in the game can get to a person's head." She could feel him looking at her, but couldn't bring herself to return his gaze. There was a long pause of silence, and he looked away again.

"Nepeta, I know about… everything," he said. In the corner of her eye, she could see him raise his knees to his chest to form a loose ball.

"Y-you know?" she whispered, turning her head to get a better look at him.

"Yeah, I know. I figured it out a while ago." Karkat took her hand in his, something that caught her slightly off guard. He never wanted to touch anyone. She wasn't sure how to say what she was feeling, so she just squeezed his hand a tiny bit. If he felt it, he didn't respond.

"There's something you have to know, Nepeta," he told her.

"What is it?" she asked. Every fiber of her body was beginning to tremble. There was no way possible that this was actually happening to her. And yet, here she was, sitting and listening as he slowly made the words form on his lips.

"Nepeta, you're really important to everybody here," she felt her hopes die, just the tiniest bit, "and I don't want you to get hurt. Please, Nepeta, don't do this to yourself."

"H-huh?" she spluttered. "What? But, Karkitty— Karkat, what do you mean?" The pieces of hope she had accidentally been building up began to fall. She felt as though she had heard these lines before, and she probably had. Karkat wasn't the only one who could slightly appreciate a romance every once in a while.

"Nepeta…" Karkat started. He raised a hand to put in on her shoulder, but drew back. "Fuck. How am I supposed to say this? Nepeta, I don't know everything about your feelings, but nobody here wants you to get hurt. And it just… wouldn't work. I don't know how to explain it, but it just wouldn't."

"But why couldn't it?" she asked quietly. She felt as though she might sob if her voice grew too loud.

"There are barriers everywhere." He sat up a little straighter, and looked directly at her. Slowly, she forced herself to look back at him.

"Like what?" she pressed. "How tall are they so that I can't just leap over them?"

Karkat scratched the back of his head. Nepeta thought he almost seemed nervous, though she didn't understand why. He had rejected her friendship in the past, so why was this so difficult for him?

"Well, don't take this the wrong way…" he said carefully, "but I think that you may be one of the problems. I mean, how much thought have you put into this? I can't promise that I know your feelings exactly, but I look at you, and I just have this feeling that you really don't know yourself as well as you think you do. What I mean is, uh… Nepeta are you certain that you really have as much red emotion as you think you do?"

Nepeta had never before felt as much anger as she did right then. Before the other troll had a chance to react, her open palm smacked him across his cheek. Tears welled in her eyes before he managed to register the pain, and by the time he was looking at her, she was scrambling away on all fours.

"Nepeta!" he called. Confusion set over him as he began chasing her. He had merely been trying to protect her, and make sure that her actions didn't end up hurting her. He also hadn't thought she would actually be this serious about her feelings. It wasn't possible for her to have had them for a while, so unless it was just a girl thing, he had no idea what was going on in her head.

Tears were streaming down her face as she ran. She would have been okay if he had just rejected her. She had figured he might. The thing she didn't understand was why he had to start prying at her feelings. She knew what she felt, so why couldn't he just be okay with that and let her go on with life? Boys could be jerks.

She turned a corner and saw an opportunity. In a single, giant leap, she grasped a grate exposed on the ceiling. Her weight caused it to open, and she crawled inside, shutting it behind her. She sat and watched as Karkat stopped directly beneath her and stared up.

"Nepeta, come down," he shouted up at her. "I'm sorry about upsetting you. If you come down, we can talk about it."

"I don't want to talk to you, Karkat," she replied. "Just… Please leave me alone for now." She needed some time to cry, and possibly update her shipping wall. It hurt, what he said about her. It was like he couldn't even remember that she was just as alive as he.

"I'm not leaving you alone until you at least tell me what I did," he yelled. She shuffled back along the pipe she was wedged in. His voice muffled the tiniest bit.

"Wait, where are you…" He listened as she slowly pressed back. "Nepeta, please wait! I really need to talk to you!"

Nepeta stopped and thought for a moment. As awful as he made her feel, and as little as she regretted hitting him, she still had feelings for him like no other troll before. One inch at a time, she slid back to the grate.

"Thank you," he said, barely audible to her. She sighed and looked directly at him.

"So, what's it going to take to get you to leave me alone?" she asked.

"Just tell me what I did," he said. "I'll leave as soon as you explain why you're so angry."

Nepeta growled. The last thing she really wanted to do was explain her emotions to him, but it was necessary, she supposed.

"Well, Karkat, it's just that… I was ready to talk to you, and be rejected. I've waited too long, and even with what John said, I knew you wouldn't feel the same way. I just had to hear you say it once and for all. So, when you tried to make me doubt my own emotions it… hurt. I've put so much thought into this, I've given up my entire romantic life because I always thought that maybe you would one day like me. And I figured that since you already knew about what I felt, you would be able to appreciate my effort a little bit. I know my feelings, Karkat. I don't need you telling me that everything I've believed for the majority of my life is wrong."

Karkat was staring at her with an obvious expression of confusion. "Wait… huh?"

Nepeta felt tears welling in her eyes again. Before she could hold back, she yelled. She yelled as she never had before. "Fuck you, Karkat Vantas!" she cried, and she pushed herself as fast as she could along the pipe.

"Crap!" Karkat thought to himself as Nepeta began moving again. He could hear her banging along inside the pipe, so following wasn't hard. It was convincing her to stop that was the challenge.

"Please, Nepeta, I just don't understand!" he called. She didn't even take the slightest of breaks.

"I really am confused. I don't know what you mean by me feeling the same way!" Nepeta went faster, and Karkat cursed his small legs. He wouldn't be able to keep this up for much longer.

He couldn't think of what to say. She was getting away from him, and he knew that if she escaped, he would never reach her. His chance would be gone forever. But he didn't know what to damn say.

Then, he felt something. An invisible hand perhaps. He found the words he wanted to say, but they were not planned by him. Rather, he could see, for a brief moment, a time when he and Nepeta were something more than friends. More than moirails. It was something he knew and understood, but he could not explain. And as he was puzzling over why he would be seeing this, the invisible hand managed to take hold of his voice.

"Nepeta, please stop," he called. "I really want to understand you, your feelings are important to me. Please, Nepeta, let me talk to you." Nepeta stopped running, just for a moment. Then, as if forcing herself to keep going, she went forward at a slightly slower pace.

"I promise, I'm never going to leave you alone again. Just let me talk to you." Nepeta stopped completely. She knew that it wasn't Karkat talking. These were not words he would ever use on his own. And yet, she trusted whoever it was that was speaking. She wanted to fall into his arms, and she wanted to tell him everything. There was a grate a few paces behind her. She backed up and opened it.

The invisible hand was gone, and suddenly both of them were looking at each other as they had moments before. There was no one left to tell them what to say.

"Nepeta," Karkat finally said. "I get really worried about you. I always want you to smile, and laugh, because when you don't, it's kinda like… like…" And he was lost again.

"Why are you so worried Karkat?" Nepeta asked. He looked at the ground instead of the ceiling. Her eyebrows furrowed with worry. "Why won't you tell me?"

He mumbled something, still not looking up.

"What?" Nepeta asked. She could feel every emotion within her starting to build up, but she wasn't sure what would happen once they reached their max.

"I don't want to be selfish," he said again. In her bafflement, Nepeta dropped down to stand next to him.

"Karkat, what are you talking about?" she questioned. He glanced at her, then dropped his sight back to the floor.

"It wouldn't be fair of me to say," he told her.

"Karkat, if you need to tell me something, it's okay," she said.

"No, it's not okay, Nepeta," he grumbled. "It's not fucking okay. You're not supposed to be helping me with my problems."

Nepeta stared at him, uncertainty flowing through her. She wanted to take his hand and tell him that it was fine, that if he needed to talk, he could. But that wasn't what he needed to hear, and she knew that well.

"So, why can't I help?"

"Because I'm the fucking leader, that's why," he said. "It's my job to make sure everybody's safe. I can't do that if you're trying to protect me."

"Oh…" Nepeta said sadly. Suddenly, an idea came to her mind. "So, if you're supposed to be the one protecting me, can you help me right now?"

"Er, sure, I guess," Karkat said uncertainly.

"Alright, come on, let's sit down," she suggested, motioning to the floor. The sat cross-legged and faced each other. In Nepeta's mind, one thought was slowly transforming into another as her plan created itself in her mind.

"So, what do you want help with?" Karkat asked her.

She smiled. "Well, you were saying that I have a problem, and I was just wondering what it is." When he didn't say anything for a moment, she tried to explain. "I'm not sure you mean what I think you mean, so I just want clarification."

"I know," Karkat said. "I'm just trying to think of the right words." He sat in silence a little longer before he looked at her again. "Well, Nepeta, from what I've gathered, I think your problem is that you're flushed for someone who doesn't like you back." He said the last part quietly, as though is she couldn't hear it she wouldn't get hurt.

"But," he started again, "I'm not sure anymore."

"Why not?"

"Um, well… I just don't think you like the person I thought you did."

"So who did you think I like?" Pieces were beginning to fit together in Nepeta's mind. She sat and watched as Karkat puzzled over how to answer.

"Er, John. The human." Karkat looked away and began biting his lip. He couldn't see as a smile grew on Nepeta's face.

"No, Karkat," she said. "That's not who I like at all." She wanted to giggle, but she couldn't bring herself to do it.

"It's not?" he said, glancing at her. "So, uh, unless you don't want to, could you tell me who you do like?"

Nepeta opened her mouth, but no sound came out. She grinned at him sheepishly, and a green blush began spreading through her cheeks.

Karkat noticed and held up his hands. "Like I said, if you don't want to tell me, you don't have to."

Nepeta sighed. "No, it's okay, Karkat, I can tell you." She looked away and closed her eyes for a moment, forcing herself to breath normally. She looked at him, took another deep breath, and said, slowly, "Well, Karkat, I think the one I'm flushed for is…" Terror gripped her, and she almost couldn't do it. She was about to lie, or just back out.

She saw his eyes. They were, for once, warm and caring. Any troll who had received advice from him knew that he could act kindly when they needed it most. Now, Nepeta needed it like she never had before. She opened her mouth again, and before she had a chance to think about the word coming out of her mouth, it was gone.

"…you."

Karkat didn't say anything. He looked like he tried to keep his cool for a moment, but it was quickly lost.

"Fuck."

Nepeta felt new tears coming to her eyes again, and she quickly wiped her face with her sleeve.

"Oh, no, no, no, that's not what I meant. Fuck, Nepeta, don't cry. Please, just stop crying." His hands were on her shoulders, and he was leaning close to her. "No, I didn't mean to hurt to you again. I'm sorry."

"I-I'm sorry, Karkat," she said once the worst of the tears had past. "I d-don't want to cry, it just kind of h-happens."

"I know you don't want to cry," he said. "Fuck, no one does."

She stared at him and sniffled a tiny bit. She could swear that his cheeks were starting to turn an odd red color. He noticed her staring and looked down, hiding his cheeks from her sight.

"How long have you been flushed for me?" he asked. He still looked down.

"Uh, I don't know," she said. "Two sweeps or something?"

"Fu—" He slapped a hand over his mouth to stop from finishing the swear.

"I'm sorry, Karkat," she said again. "I'm really, really sorry."

"Will you stop calling me damn Karkat?" he snapped. Nepeta blinked in surprise.

"You mean... you want me to call you Karkitty?" Nepeta cocked her head.

"I know that it makes you happy. If calling me that helps to make you smile, then yes. Call me Karkitty." Although he couldn't stand the nickname, Karkat meant every word he said. Nepeta could almost hear it in his voice.

A smile grew over her face. Her tears completely disappeared, and she pushed herself forward for a hug. "Karkitty!" she cried, holding him close.

He was surprised at first, but was soon returning the hug. She felt warm and her hair was soft. He held her for a long time, until she was the one to break the hug.

"Wait… So does this mean you… you know…" Nepeta watched him uncertainly.

"Like you?" he guessed. She nodded.

Karkat sighed and looked to the wall, then the floor, but never at her. He opened his mouth a couple times, but closed it again. After what felt like an eternity, he finally said something.

"Fuck, how were you able to admit something like that?"

It wasn't how Nepeta had imagined it would happen. Her fantasies were much more romantic, with white wingbeasts and flowers. And yet, sitting here in the middle of a meteor, with greens tear stains on her face and a light bruise forming where she hit him, it was better than she had ever dared to hope for. He'd said it in the perfect way for Karkat.

Then, she couldn't stop herself, and tears were starting to come again. She pulled him close and hugged him, burying her face in his shoulder.

"Nepeta, what…?" Karkat stammered. "Fuck, what did I say?"

"No, Karkitty," she said. "I'm just so happy… I can't believe I waited this long to tell you… How long has it been?"

"Around perigees," Karkat said, gently patting her back. "I'm sorry I didn't say anything."

She drew back for a moment to look him in the face. "B-but I thought y-you and Terezi w-were a thing."

"We were," Karkat explained. "For a little while, at least. But when I realized that I was flushed for you, we were already getting distant."

"You two still seem so close right now, though."

Karkat sighed again. "I know. I'm sorry, Nepeta, I'm so damn sorry. I was lying the whole time." She gazed at him curiously, so he quickly explained. "I was afraid to give up on her at first. She was my first matesprit, and I thought that I might not find another like her. Another troll who would put up with me. So we stayed close, just in case something happened, and my feelings switched back to her. They never did, of course. Then, all this game stuff started to happen, and I got afraid."

"What was there to be scared of? I mean, besides imps and all that stuff."

"Well, I was able to talk to you more. And every time we talked, it made me so happy. You have no idea. But, I can't be a leader if I'm happy. You know that. No one listens to me unless I'm shouting. And when I'm around you I just… can't feel angry at anything. You make me so happy, Nepeta. I've never felt this way about anyone else before, and it's kind of frightening how much power you could have over me. So I lied, and I told everyone that I can't stand you."

They gazed at each other. Karkat felt he should do something, so he raised a hand and gently touched her cheek. "It hurt. I felt awful knowing that I was making you unhappy."

"Karkitty…" Nepeta whispered. She held his hand, feeling the warmth of it. She knew that they would have to get up at some point, but not yet.

"Nepeta, I thought I was helping people when I lied to you. But a team of strong warriors will never be worth causing you pain. I swear, Nepeta, I am never going to lie to you again. Never."

He wasn't really certain that what he did next was appropriate, but it felt like the right thing to do, so he went with it. His hand slid behind her neck, and he pulled her close. Their lips met.

Nepeta purred, and didn't try to hold it back this time. Karkat heard the sound, and a strange feeling came over him. He had never felt so happy before. It was like everything he could have hoped for was a reality, and the sky was the limit.

It wasn't a first for either of them. That didn't matter, though. It did nothing to take away from the magic of the moment as each finally knew certain that the other was feeling the same as them.

He pulled back after what felt, to both, like too short a time. But he had a good reason.

Warmth was spreading through his face, and he knew that at this point, he would never be able to keep his secret from Nepeta.

"Karkitty?" Nepeta looked at him sadly, wondering why he wasn't looking at her. Suddenly, out of what was either bravery or curiosity, she placed her fingers under his chin and made him look at her.

She stared at the bright-red blush for a moment, then smiled. "You're adorable, Karkitty!" she squeaked, kissing him on the nose.

Karkat smiled at her. He knew that he didn't have to ask why she didn't care, or if she was going to tell. She was Nepeta.

Nepeta smiled, and pulled him close. She wasn't ready to call him her matesprit, not just yet. But she knew that with work and bravery, this would all be possible. They would work together to make it happen.

They returned to the lab together. Karkat was nervous about announcing it to everyone else, so they didn't say anything. Instead, he went back to trolling John, as did she.

AC: :33 john?

AC: :DD john, i think i did it!


End file.
